Merhba

Monday, June 06, 2005

Ride the Bus with Us

The bus system here is actually really easy to use. We hopped on one of the orange and white Maltese icons on our very first day and got around easily for the first two weeks. All the buses (except for a couple of routes) go to and from Valletta, the nation’s capital. Right outside Valletta there’s a big round-about with the gigantic Triton Fountain in the middle where all the buses stop. If you need to get to the other side of the island, just hop on any bus, it’ll take you to Valletta, then hop off and ask somebody which bus goes to the other side, then hop on and you’re there. Way better than the VTA back home. It’s a simple matrix.

In fact, I was on my way into town wearing a black trench coat and dark glasses, trying to get on a bus, when I met a little, bald British boy in a toga.
Me: How do you it?
Boy: Do not try to stand in line for the bus. That is impossible. Only try to realize the truth.
Me: The truth?
Boy: There is no line.

He was right. People just sort of form a congregation near the spot they expect the bus to stop. When the right route number comes along, someone sticks out their thumb like a hitch-hiker, and the bus slows down for the most part. But unless there’s more than two people getting on or off (or if the one person could be as old as two), don’t expect the ride to come to a full and complete stop.

Once you get on the bus, you’ll pay the driver the incredibly reasonable fare of 20 Maltese cents. You’ll see the name of the bus somewhere near the front, or maybe it’s the name of the driver. You’ll also see a picture or shadow-box of the Virgin Mary and a sticker of some other favorite saint, and everyone crosses themselves when you enter the freeway (although we’ll soon be discussing the Maltese version of a freeway). You’ll notice that nowhere in my narrative thus far have I said that the door closed. It never does. Maybe that has something to do with everyone crossing themselves.

Half the buses are very recent models with low floors, bucket seats, and a very sophisticated electronic bell indicating “next stop, please.” The historical versions are like school buses with steep steps, narrow rows, and some twine rigged across the ceiling attached to little box that buzzes much more loudly than necessary. But all the buses, old or new, are orange on the bottom, white on the top, and have extremely loud horns (some of which I suspect would play La Cucaracha if the driver would lean a little longer). The drivers also are very helpful chaps, if only I could read lips, since the engines are too loud for any conversation.

In all, we were very happy to ride the bus as it was easy and convenient. But it did take us two hours to go less than 10 miles, so I’m glad someone in the church loaned us a car. But that’s a whole new adventure, so stay tuned.

3 Comments:

  • HAHAHAHA!!!! Oh geeze... that is too funny. "There is no line..." I seriously just wet my pants. That's even funnier than this "What is your Star Wars pick up line" quiz that I took, which resulted in "Date, or date not. There is no 'let friends us be.'" Hope you guys are having a rockin time. Stay cool and stay dry. PEACE.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4:52 AM  

  • Yep, that is the kind of funny I have come to expect from you. Thanks for not letting me down.

    By Blogger Russell, at 7:48 PM  

  • Guess neither of you will be working in a bank anytime soon!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 6:08 AM  

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